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Emotional Intelligence Chapter 1 Article
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Building Blocks in Mastering Your Emotions
from: Self Help Building Human Qualities and Mechanisms The building blocks are elements we choose to incorporate in our life. Rather the building blocks are already there, yet it takes YOU to build those elements. Building blocks include pieces of our lives that have been shredded through life's tumbles and falls. For instance, if you recently come out of a bad relationship, you'll need to reconstruct the pieces to make yourself a whole person again. This helps you to learn control, which helps to command and master the emotions. Most people in my area are unwilling to give love a second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth and the list goes on, giving it another chance. They often say, "I've been there; done that; don't want to do it again." Alternatively, they say, "I tried love; it didn't work, so now I'm out to have fun." This is a clear indication that their emotions rule them.
As you stumble and fall throughout your lifetime, you're tearing down the human qualities, mechanisms and the like that pastes you together. Some of those qualities include confidence, self-esteem, self-assurance, hope, faith, and the like. Once these qualities and elements of human makeup are torn apart, it often takes great effort to build the blocks. The problem is that doubts sets in, inferiority complexes arise, guilt takes over, grief and blaming steps in the door, thus tearing you down. Thus, the emotions become the rulers.
Since we've considered a breakdown in relationships, let's consider inferiority. Inferiority is a critical significant view of personal inadequacy, which often is a consequence either in diffidence or from overcompensating in overstatement. In other words, the person will compensate by placing higher value of self in one area, while recognizing flaws in another area. This person has a self-esteem problem.
Often counselors will deem inferiority complex issues as an exaggeration. This isn't always true, since background has something to do with it. Someone in this persons life has degraded, put down, torn down and shredded this persons humane mechanisms, thus the exaggeration in most instances is placed on counselors. However, the person has a degree of exaggeration, since many of these people have abilities, qualities and the like that surpass others.
Overall, inferiority complexes are collections of national inferiorities, cultural and provincial accumulations. How do you build on inferiority to control the mind and command the emotions? First, you look in the mirror and start changing the things about you that you want changed about others. This will help you build confidence and self-esteem, which can wipe out those inferiorities. The problem is media, television, and the world as a whole places high emphasis on sexy, sexuality and the like, thus it's created nothing more than an ongoing chain of problems; and an inferiority complex is on that list.
Now, let's say you'd recently left a bad relationship. What do you need to rebuild or reconstruct to make you complete again? Do you feel guilty? Do you believe it's your fault the breakdown occurred? If so then you must realize it takes two to tangle. Consider what the mate has done throughout the relationship without blaming. Do you feel grief? Do you feel less than adequate? Do you feel attractive? Are you blaming him or her for the failure? Are you taking any responsibility for the let down? Do you have doubts of your abilities? Do you feel like you will never give love another try?
You must move these blocks from your path to build the mind, learn to master, and command the emotions.
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