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 1. Don't stop too soon. We get easily discouraged if
something does not turn out the way we want it to be. We have to be
patient. Without patience, life can be extremely frustrating.
Likewise, we should be persistent. If at first we do not succeed,
let us try another approach until we reach our goal.
2. Turn failures into something
positive. Failures are part of life. It may hurt at first, but
we must keep in mind that there are lessons to be learned in all
failures. We must never let failures bring us down. Instead, we must
use these as opportunities to rise up and emerge as better
persons.
3. Do not be frustrated by negative circumstances
and people. If we know how to take praises and compliments, we must
also learn to take criticisms, be it constructive or destructive. We
must never let negative words spoken by other people discourage or
defeat us. We know ourselves better than anyone else does. Focus on
what we know is true, that is, we have the capacity to pursue
happiness and fulfillment.
4. Never think or say, "I
can't." If we keep on thinking that we cannot do a particular
task, chances are, we will never be able to do it. Many people never
discover their true potential because they are too afraid to try.
All we have to do is believe in ourselves.
5. Be determined
and persevering. We have to be persistent and enduring to be able to
reach our potential. These are the most important factors in
overcoming disappointments.
Rage
Rage or
anger is a strong feeling of displeasure. It is an uncontrolled
emotion when we feel hurt or aggrieved. If not handled
appropriately, it can cause unhappiness. We should deal with anger
quickly before it turns into bitterness and
hatred.
First, we should determine the cause of our
rage. After that, we may consider sharing our emotions with a friend
or counselor. Do not keep anger bottled up within; we will feel
better just by talking about it and having someone listen to what we
have to say.
Another way to deal with rage is by simply
asking for help. We can ask help from people around us. Other people
deal with anger by seeking help from the Universe/God. They seek
assistance to be able to imbibe the virtue of humility to be able to
forgive the people who have wronged them.
We must
realize that none of us is perfect. We are bound to commit mistakes
at one point in our lives. Forgiveness is a virtue. It is a reward
for an honest healing process. Letting go of any resentment and
grudge pulls us away from loneliness.
The act of
forgiveness allows us to get rid of excess emotional baggage that
may have been holding us back and weighing us down. Indeed,
forgiveness is a priceless virtue that can only be realized through
an honest reconciliation with one's past and a genuine openness to
welcome life anew.
Worry, Anxiety and
Sress
 Worry is one component of anxiety, which is the broader
term used to describe internal restlessness. Stress is a physical,
mental, or emotional factor that causes tension. When left
unchecked, these three may result to a more serious
disorder.
To overcome these three barriers to
happiness, we may consider the following:
1. Change
our outlook in life. We should always have a positive
attitude. Reading the scriptures and uplifting books may alter our
perception in life since these materials are full of inspiring
verses that will surely lift our spirits and encourage us to fight
our way through life.
2. Initiate some changes in
lifestyle. Start small. Small and meaningful changes can cure
boredom and burnout that can cause stress and anxiety. Small changes
provide a fresh perspective or outlook. We can change the route
going to the office or start to eat at different dining places or
meet new officemates from other department. We can also go on
vacation to give ourselves a break.
3. Get enough sleep.
Adults are advised to get 6-8 hours of sleep. When we are sleeping,
our mind and body get their much-needed rest. Worries, anxiety, and
stress can keep us awake; and lack of sleep results to restlessness.
If sleepless nights persist, consult a doctor right away. Since
worry, anxiety, stress, and insomnia often co-exist, anti-anxiety
drugs as prescribed by the doctor may help.
4. Have adequate
exercise and relaxation. Like sleep, exercise and relaxation
also release chemicals that help decrease anxiety. They free our
minds from all worries and cares in life.
5. Live each day
as it comes. We must leave the past behind, not worry too much
about the future, and focus on the present. Yesterday is past and
gone forever. Tomorrow is yet to come and no one knows what it holds
for us. What matters is today because we can live only at the
present time.
6. Listen to relaxing music. Some
types of music have a calming and soothing effect on our minds and
soul. Listening may help us take our minds off things. A variation
of this is to surround ourselves with pleasant smells. This can be
achieved by having fresh flowers, potpourri, or scented candles in
most rooms of the house or office.
7. Consider medications and counseling.
Seeking professional help can change our lives completely. A
physician can prescribe medications for relief and a counselor can
offer encouragement and support.
Envy and Jealousy
Envy stems from
dissatisfaction. Envious people feel that they are getting a raw
deal and that others are much better off than they are. Envy can
make us go for unachievable goals for ourselves as we keep our focus
on what others have instead of appreciating what we
have.
Jealousy, on the other hand, is another source of
dissatisfaction and one form of "self-torture." Having low
self-esteem causes envy and jealousy. These can only be resolved
when we trust and believe in ourselves. Moreover, we should be
appreciative of our blessings in life. Self-motivation guru Wayne
Dyer said, "Simply put, you believe that things or people make you
unhappy, but this is not accurate. You make yourself
unhappy."
Pessimism
Pessimism is synonymous
with skepticism. Observe skeptics. They always anticipate negative
events and often, this thought paralyzes them from taking action.
Benjamin Disraeli once shared, "Action may not always bring
happiness, but there is no happiness without action."
Pessimistic persons are extremely
cautious that they hold back from enjoying a normal life or
achieving their objectives. Pessimism starts with negative
thoughts.
Counteract pessimism by being optimistic. As
we become more optimistic, we become happier. The age-old question
on whether our glasses are half full or half empty relates to
optimism. Optimistic people always hope for the best and expect that
things will turn out well.
Overcome pessimism by having
the discipline to look at the good side, the will to improve, and
conviction that recovery is possible by following certain
guidelines.
These guidelines are:
1.
Have strong faith. Trusting a power greater than us may be helpful
to see the brighter side of things. We must revitalize our
spirituality and faith in Universal Power.
2. Surround
ourselves with optimistic friends. Listening and opening ourselves
to positive ideas about life may help jumpstart a change in attitude
and point of view.
3. Cultivate an open mind. Understanding
that there is some value in criticism may help us open our eyes to
the fact that happiness in life is worth pursuing.
4. Do a
self-assessment of our behavior. We start by comparing our behavior
with that of our family members, co-workers, and friends. Learn to
objectively identify productive and healthy behaviors. Decide to
have more of this type of behavior. We must realize that pessimism
affects our capacity to feel happy emotions to the
fullest.
5. Seek empowerment. We should learn to focus on our
goals and the things that we want in life. We must constantly tell
ourselves that we can succeed. Never let other people drag us to
negativity and pessimism.
Whatever barrier comes our
way, always remember that for every problem, there is a solution and
we keep forgetting that the solution is in our hands. It is all up
to us to decide how to deal with it. Bear in mind that we have
complete control of our lives - our feelings, thoughts, behaviors
and attitude. We can overcome all barriers if we just trust and
believe in ourselves. Do not allow anything or anyone ruin our
chance to be happy. Only we can determine the course of our life.
Take responsibility for it.
Eighth key to happiness:
We take responsibility for our own
happiness.
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